Monday, December 15, 2008

Christmas Light Connoisseur

I love the holiday season. Seeing Christmas trees lit up, lights lining the streets & just decorating to the extreme. It really brightens up the night with the amount of lights everywhere. Some people abuse this privilege though. You know who I mean. Those that try & be Clark Griswald. Those tacky people who put up far too many things & mix everything all together. Call me a Christmas light racist, but the lights need to be segregated: colored & white do not mix!

I am so judgmental of people who do this. I tend to drive slower during the holiday season, just to appreciate the holiday spirit around me but then there are those eye sores that just make me wanna drive my car right into the front of their house to put not only myself out of the misery, but their house as well. If you put icicle lights around your ledge, do NOT have them in colors. They are icicles; icicles are white. Also, don't decorate half your house with colors & half with white. Pick one. I personally prefer white, red or green lights but if a house is decorated with all colored lights & nothing but colored lights, I will accept it. Under no circumstances should you ever think that decorating one bush colored, one white, one red, one blue & one green is a good idea. Trust me, it's not. I also have a problem with blue lights. Unless you are Jewish, blue lights should not be used. Christmas colors are red, green & white so stick with the traditional. Also, this is a religious holiday not an American one so please avoid red, white & blue. I also HATE when people have blinking lights that are more like Las Vegas then La Navidad.

One of my biggest decorating pet peeves is those massive, imposing blow-up items. One is acceptable on a very large lawn. People on Staten Island do not have large lawns, do not use them. If you can't pull off one, then you definitely can't pull off multiple. Nor can anyone get away with some of the designs of these hideous creations. Since when does Santa ride in a helicopter? I am so against these for every holiday season. There was a family that lived near me in Coral Gables that had at least one for every holiday. At Christmas time last year, I counted & they had 14. FOURTEEN! I don't care if you live on a golf course (which these people certainly did not) you cannot get away with 14.

My mother tries to go against my advice at times when I am not around to defend myself. I knew Maggie was meant to be my dog when she chose to chew on the blue lights while we were decorating on her first Christmas before Linda could put them up behind my back. Luckily for my sanity, I was around for decorating this year & was able to stop any unnecessary colors. We have a very tasteful white light display on the bushes in front of the house. She did get some sort of twinkle light that I am not so into but even I can compromise. Red, white & green lights also surround the door & the inside window. Traditional, tasteful, terrific.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I am so with you on being the light Nazi. A personal pet peeve of mine is when someone reaches the end of the line and just STRINGS THE LIGHTS ON A DIAGONAL across the house so they can reach the outlet. Oh I hate it.

And I too was able to intercept Jeandogs attempt for colored lights on the tree (even though we've always had them, it's kind of a tradition), but this year, sparkling white.